G.I. Joe, 1986: Houston, We Have Lift-Off

By Destro Designs – Viper Den Studios

To understand 1986, the nexus point of G.I. Joe, I think it’s important to understand what the line had in mind when it came to the brand as a whole.

A major change was afoot at Hasbro’s brain trust, and they were pushing the idea of a new leader for Cobra to emerge in the G.I. Joe Movie. Starting a ground campaign for this was the five-part mini-series that kicked off Season 2 of the Sunbow cartoon: Arise, Serpentor, Arise.

Anyone who knows me knows this is basically my favorite G.I. Joe mini-series, and more or less my favorite offering from Sunbow. It introduced so many of the new characters, including some on the new entrance song to the show.

Hasbro wanted the core of the upcoming G.I. Joe Movie to be focused around the new leader of Cobra. The two schools of thought were that Cobra would have to build a new leader from the ground up, or align with a hidden hand calling the shots from the dark.

Hasbro said, “Hold my beer while we do BOTH.”

Therein was born Serpentor, but also Golobulus and his flying nutsack.

Despite Serpentor being annoying and a giant, insufferable prick, Arise… worked. The dynamic of him being a demonstrative douchebag and the dominant hand of Cobra, across the aisle from the bumbling retreater that Cobra Commander was, was good.

The most recognizable and awesome piece of G.I. Joe marketing art came from this year as well. Mainframe, Lifeline, Beach Head, Sci-Fi, Dial-Tone, Wet-Suit, and Hawk lead the charge as French Version Roadblock swings on a vine, and Leatherneck inches forward on a Recon Sled toward advancing Vipers and B.A.T.s.

This is an utterly iconic image to me. I had it on a lunch box, a poster, and multiple drawings on huge poster board. I was obsessed.

Shocker, I know.

I also feel the introduction of Dr. Mindbender was important, as he appeared to run all the schemes and plans for domination of science, politics, and finance. The direction of Cobra’s plans often filtered through this man’s hair-brained ideas.

A bald man with a David Bowie-in-Labyrinth-style codpiece, held up by suspenders on his shirtless torso. Dude was legit Looney Tunes.

But anyways, all of this sets the stage for the releases that came.

Overall, the figures were a gorgeous blend of true-blue war fighters in realistic tactical garb. Guys like Beach Head, Leatherneck, Low-Light, Hawk, and even Mainframe were all in traditional-style military dress, but done AMAZINGLY.

But then add cats like Sci-Fi, Dial-Tone, Roadblock V2, and Wet-Suit, and you had realistic military with flair and a futuristic look. It was a flawless lineup.

On the Cobra/The Enemy side, there was the aforementioned cock-cap-wearing Mindbender, and two of the most iconic troopers in Cobra history: the B.A.T. and the Viper. There were also the remaining Dreadnoks: Zarana and Zandar, Zartan’s twin siblings, and of course Monkeywrench and Thrasher. The ’Noks all made their debut in Episode 1 of Arise, Serpentor, Arise, with Thrasher as the driver of the Thunder Machine.

Also making his debut is the man himself, Sgt. Slaughter. He rolls up on the scene and washes like 50 B.A.T.s with his bare hands and doesn’t break a sweat. He impresses General Hawk so much that Hawk hands over the reins of the Joes’ training to Slaughter on the spot, getting himself thrown into the PT.

That’s a first impression.

All in all, this is where my mind was developed enough to understand all this madness, but still young enough to believe it. Slaughter being a real person added a cool factor of, “If the Sarge is real, maybe some of these other characters or vehicles are too.”

And with that mind-melt of the slight direction change, the new characters, and the new season of Sunbow starting off like a tactical nuke wiping out any expectations of what was to come, I fully threw myself into the lore. I wrapped myself in the flag of the G.I. Joe brand, and I’ve never shouted anything from the mountaintops like I have “YO JOE!” in the year of our Sarge, 1986.