The M.A.S.S. Device, Had Me Hook Line and Sinker!

By Destro Designs – Viper Den Studios

Right off the bat, the intro of Episode 1 of the Sunbow cartoon, The M.A.S.S. Device. “The Cobra Strikes” hits Like a sledgehammer to a 6 year old who was craving such a thing, but didn’t even know it..

Being saddled by the far out Fantasy action of He-Man and on other side, the ultra Sci-fi space odyssey of the Star Wars movies, this opening sequence of real world military figures doing fantastical stuff, but yet tuned in just right to seem believable was a sight to see.

They were on earth using technology that, while far fetched, seemed totally plausible and especially to a kid.

Its a huge fishing hook that i bit down on like a Bass onto a newly sewn up fly, dropped by a master fisherman when stalker threw up that pack of TNT and shot it with a laser blowing it up. It was inexplicable , but I remember completely thinking it was the coolest damn thing i had ever seen. Its a montage of awesome action between the Joes and Cobra, that, rightfully so, gets the juices flowing.

Duke hit us with, ” i’m gonna Kick the mustard out of that crazy hot dog…he could’ve smeared us all over the runway”
And its so good, the moment is T-Boned when a GIRL got out of the pilot’s seat. Cool, but as a kid, wasn’t expecting it.

And before you get a chance to get your feet underneath you, here comes Major Bludd screaming, “COBRA” and our first skirmish between these two forever foes ensues. And after a soft test of the Joes defenses, Budd’s circles back and heads out..

Enter the scene where the aforementioned hook i had bite down on, gets set by the fisherman yanking the line at the perfect strength and the perfect angle….as that incredible awesome and evil sounding music rolls in, we get eyes on The Enemy’s Castle for the first time.

The long winding path leads up a group of travelers as that truly iconic voice hisses, “HE COMES”….and once again, i am levitating with excitement from this series of iconic moments come barreling into my screen.

The hook is fully set and no amount of struggle will stop the direction i am being pulled toward the fisherman’s boat. I am trapped and barely fighting it.

Destro spits out his first lines and shows his moral flexibility as he scare tactics his way out of paying the sherpa’s. He tosses his cloaks hood back like the pimp that he is and steps forward and uses, what is in my opinion, the coolest thing I’ve ever seen, that swaying Snake that goes rigid and ASKS HIM FOR HIS ID.

Now, i know this seems like an almost pedestrian part of all the action that is to come in the series, but it is so pivotal and memorable to me that it is the moment I think I decided that I never wanted to be entertained by anything but Gi Joe. It’s definitely an accumulation of all the first couple minutes and including the intro, but when that snake swayed his way up and stiffened and allowed Destro to put his hand in there, that was it.

I was being pulled out of the water and into the Gi Joe boat. I was boated, never to return to the water for I was now obsessed. Between the handful of figures and vehicles I had when the Sunbow cartoon started, I was all in.

Hook, line and sinker.

I watched the rest of the episode from the boat. Seeing Destro drop the cloak entirely was another magical moment because he was the coolest thing ever. Even cooler than Snake Eyes, although I did really love him and his figure. Destro was a badass and I instantly wished he was the boss.

Destro and Cobra Commander have an exchange that would set the tone for their tenuous relationship and I was soaking it up. The M.A.S.S. Device was raised and finally, I had a complete picture of the show.

The Joes were the good guys, Cobra was the bad guys and they desperately wanted to dominate the world.

From intro start, to the first time you hear those famous words, “Gi Joe will return after these messages” it is the perfectly fishing fly. Sized and shaped exactly like the fish wanted, toss into the right pool of water into the creek, at the right angle, it was an instant hit on that fly and the lure was set, all before the first commercial.

Hook, Line and Sink